IT TAKES A TRIBE
“Surrogacy” was placed on my heart about 4 years ago. I always get asked the question, “WHY, what made you want to do this?” My answer: The feeling I got when our first son came into this world, the moment you become a mother. That feeling right there in that moment; that is what I want to bless another woman with. I want to make an ever-lasting impact on a family and change their life and be the woman to help bring their baby into the world.
I could not imagine not being a mother. The past 6 ½ years raising our boys have been the best times of our lives.
Although it seemed easy to just have a baby for another family. In reality there are a lot of steps to getting to your final transfer day. I want to share with other woman all the steps I took, that honestly went by so very fast! My surrogacy journey officially started in March 2019 when I was matched with my intended family.
PSYCH EVALUATION: First I completed a psych evaluation that was 568 questions all true and false. This was very extensive, plus you have to have about a 45min phone call along with it.
BLOOD WORK = YOUR NEW HOBBY: I always joked with the ladies at the lab because I became a regular. I had/have been poked more times than I could count. This is a general process in the beginning for clearance and it will continue all through the pregnancy.
PAP SMEAR CLEARANCE: Yes this is mandatory. Mine was scheduled for April 2, 2019. This was a fast appointment at my primary doctors office. When I shared the news with the nurses and staff that I was in the process of being cleared medically to be a surrogate they were thrilled! After this appointment I remember being so excited because I had checked off another box; that made me one more step closer to being medically cleared.
OFFICIALLY MEDICALLY CLEARED: All my results from my testing came back fairly fast it felt like. When I got the call I had been medically cleared and we could keep moving forward all of the feelings filled up my heart!
MY IUD REMOVAL: I was lucky and the intended mother came with me to this appointment. I was nervous because getting an IUD placed was not the most comfortable moment and I couldn’t imagine it coming out. She held my hand and it was out in seconds. The Nurse laughed about how amazing I was when it came out and how I took a photo of it. Usually when you stop a birth control it can take your body weeks to months to start your normal period after removal.
MY FIRST PERIOD: I was expecting about 6 months to start my normal flow… I WAS WRONG! It took me 4 days. I laugh reading my past Instagram posts “ I started my full flow in my white sweats literally blood everywhere. In that moment what did I do? Of course send a photo of my pants to my husband and the intended family! Remember we celebrate all the funny little moments ITS OUR NORMAL”
TIME TO SET APPOINTMENT AT IVF CENTER: The IVF center wants to see you 12 days after you start your period. I also started a low dose birth control pill the day after I made this appointment. The IVF center is about 3.5-4 hours away, located in Beverly Hills, California.
BEVERLY HILLS APPOINTMENT: My husband and I traveled down south and got our blood drawn; yes both for him it was to run a drug test and STD check, I had an ultrasound on my uterus finding out I had some tissue build up that would need to be removed this was expected due to me having an IUD for a year and half.
MAKING MY UTERUS GOLDEN: My procedure was in the end of May 2019. The intended mom drove me down to the Santa Barbara office. I remember lying there being so nervous but so comforted at the same time. The Hysteroscopy was done to make my uterus golden and clean environment for the embryo transfer.
RHEUMATOLOY APPOINTMENT: My. Last. Box. The doctors were checking everything this was new to me. I was amazed at all the details they pay attention to; to get you to your transfer day!
MEDICATION STARTS: When I started medications it was everyday in my belly. This then turned into a 3x a day normal adding oral medications, vaginal suppositories and injections of hormones in my butt! Medications started 2-3 before transfer and went until I was 12 weeks along.
ULTRASOUNDS = ALL THE TIME: We had a goal the doctors had a goal how thick my lining needed to be to do the embryo transfer! I got to a 7 in just 2 days and swear it was the beet juice I drank!
TRANSFER DAY! The intended parents, my husband and I drove down to Santa Barbara for the transfer on July 2019. It was the most emotional happy day ever! I stayed at their home to be on bed rest for 3 days and then came home.
WHERE I AM NOW The embryo took on the first try and I'm currently 21 weeks along. I am so excited for the intended parents to have that moment in just 18 short weeks. That moment I want every couple to experience in life of becoming a mother and father-- because sometimes actually all the time it truly takes a tribe.
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By: Jessica Jackson